Wrecked

Getting hit from the rear by another car is a singularly dis-empowering experience, at least for me. It's happened four times now so I've had plenty of opportunity to reflect on the experience. For over fifteen years I've been taking a prescription drug for chronic pain due to whiplash. You don't forget about it when you have to take a pill every day to cope with the effects of your wrecks.

When something didn't turn out perfect, Mom always wanted me to look for the lesson. If I got a B on a report card she'd ask, "What could you have done to make it an A?" If a friend hurt my feelings she'd prompt me to analyze my behavior to figure out what brought on the insult. She didn't mean any harm, indeed she meant to help, but I developed an inflated sense of responsibility that easily devolves into  self-blame for stuff that is not in my control. It took some firm talk from my minister and therapist to convince me that it's not always about me, and to quit feeling guilty for things other people do.

So after being rear-ended at a stop light, I automatically tried to understand what I did to bring it on. Then a few years later it happened again. State Farm dropped my policy even though they had never paid a dime, reinforcing my self-blame tendencies. The customer service rep who took my bewildered call said I didn't do anything wrong, just "happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time one too many times." To this day I don't know what to do with that statement. All of my wrecks happened in my hometown in the afternoon or early evening. What's the right place and time to drive?

Later on I was sandwiched in a 5-car pileup; I don't count that as a rear-ender. Several years later I took another hit at a red light. And it happened again a couple weeks ago as I waited, with brake lights and turn signal on, to make a left turn. It's been ten years but when I saw that SUV's grill rapidly growing bigger in my rearview mirror, the dread was all too familiar. With oncoming traffic on the left and more traffic zipping by on the right, there was nowhere to go and nothing to do but wait for impact, hoping I don't get shoved into another vehicle. The other driver said to me, "I never saw you until I hit you."

I've thought about this a lot. What's the lesson? Hell if I know!

Good behavior or Good news?

I'm pondering the ideas in a Washington Post blog post about contemporary Christian sermons and worship services. The ideas are summed up in the author's claim "The  heart of the Christian faith is Good News not good behavior."

How much of faithful living is about trying to live up to the ideals of one's religion, and how much of it is about accepting the grace that lets us off the hook because noone actually can? I feel tension every day about that.

For me, those feelings are resolved when I imagine God being much less interested in my mistakes than I am. In other words, the universe is swirling around doing its thing in a context so much larger than I could ever imagine, I need to remember that I have a real but very tiny role in it. In other, other words, it's not all about me.

What a Wedding Creates

Our daughter married a wonderful man a few years ago. Their anniversary is at this time of year, and I've been thinking about the wedding and what it meant to our family.

By committing themselves to a future together legally, spiritually, and emotionally, they created a brand-new web of relationships that didn't exist before. I am grateful that the host of people who accompanied each of them into their relationship-- relatives, friends, co-workers, mentors--are healthy influences and people of goodwill.

They established a positive climate for everyone in this new web, by making their wedding ceremony and reception activities as much about the supporters gathered there as it was about the couple. Our daughter's wedding was a wonderful event; I look back on it with pride and awe. More important, it created a new community with the potential to bless hundreds of lives in new and powerful ways.

Ministering to Animals and Pet Owners

Do animals need and deserve attention from the church? If so, how would one go about providing such a ministry? My home church has been exploring this for several years. We have an Animal Ministry and today I saw pets in the pews with their owners, enjoying our regular 11:59 worship service. What an unconventional and mind-expanding sight! A special blessing for animals was held outdoors in the courtyard after the service. Last week, our church held a pet memorial service to comfort people who mourn and miss a deceased pet. I really appreciate my pastors' inclusive concept of ministry. They constantly expand my view of compassion and service.

High Fructose Corn Syrup

Public pressure has caused some food manufacturers to change their ingredients. It's even common now to see "No high fructose corn syrup" printed right on the labels. What's interesting about that, is that high fructose corn syrup is the exact same thing as cane sugar after it hits our mouths. I would be interested to know who funded the propaganda against corn syrup. This short video gives the best explanation of the facts regarding this controversy.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8RDCnDK2K6Y&feature=youtube_gdata_player

Why Drop Bombs on Syria?

I'm dismayed by recent rhetoric of Pres. Obama, Sec. of State Kerry, and Sec. of Defense Hagel justifying military intervention in Syria's civil war. After firmly criticizing the invasion of Iraq (then-senator Obama actually voted against giving authority for it), it is surreal to hear Hagel and the president speaking vaguely about "threats to American interests" and "building an international coalition" against the Syrian government. Although Prime Minister Cameron wants to join the US, yesterday the British parliament voted to stay out of it, reflecting public opinion there. A solid majority here are also against intervention, but Pres. Obama won't ask our lawmakers to vote. He used to say he would never unilaterally go to war like Pres. Bush did. Why the change of heart?

I stumbled on this map from Der Speigel of presumed chemical weapons facilities in Syria. Someone recently deployed some of them to devastating effect in the country, which the Obama administration is blaming on the government and promoting as a humanitarian reason to bomb targets there. I don't believe for a minute that's the reason.

But this map made me see for the first time how widely distributed and close to borders the materials may be. With a civil war raging and so many people on the move, I imagine equipment and chemical stock could easily become unsecured. I'm sure lots of criminal and terrorist organizations would love to scoop up some of those bad boys. Isreal is certainly worried about it. Could this be the real reason the US government wants to attack Syria?

And if so, why not just say that?

You can call me Grandma!

Our first grandchild was born last spring, and like most grandparents we are utterly smitten. What a fantastic feeling, seeing my child tend so lovingly and competently to her baby. It's indescribable, really. Indescribably GOOD.

Midcentury in Minnesota

Rochester has many wonderful Midcentury style buildings, including the Mayo Clinic and Public Library! Even the exam room at Mayo makes me happy.

Happy National Dog Day!

I heard on the morning news that it's National Dog Day. If I'd known about this our family would have been celebrating it for years!

Canine Veterans, Not Equipment

I'm so happy about this! This year's Defense Dept Appropriation bill, HR 4310, signed by President Obama, includes provisions for "Retirement, adoption, care, and recognition of military working dogs"! Sec. 361 spells it out, starting with reclassification: "The Secretary of Defense shall classify military working dogs as canine members of the armed forces. Such dogs shall not be classified as equipment."

I wrote a post about this on May 24, 2011. At that time, Maj. Gen. Mary Kay Hertog, who oversaw the adoption program begun in 2000, was advocating for reclassification. She received mixed reviews in her next assignment heading up the Sexual Assault Prevention and Response Office, but she certainly made a positive change for the dogs and their handlers.

These dogs will finally get the respect and care they deserve. Instead of being left behind or killed in foreign countries when military units leave, the dogs will be transferred at the defense department's expense to either an adoption center or the 341st Training Squadron. They are also entitled to veterinary care for life. Hoo-ah!